"I shan't, I mustn't" pleaded the fair maiden. "Oh, 'tis not your decision to make" said the bastardly Lord Mozzarella with a grin, his pale white body gleaming in its nakedness. Her eyes widened at the sheer sight of the mozzarella stick dangling betwixt his legs.
My dad got a stack of romance novels given to him once when he used to sell at flea markets. My wife and I were dating and we thought, as a goof, we would try to read them out loud in the car to my parents. Only rule, you had to keep a straight face. Person to laugh first lost.
I lost when I had to read the words "He approached her dewey entrance..."
Never in my right mind could I ever read that and get into the story. I even remember my wife asking which one was the dewey one because what if she had taco bell earlier that day....
Every now and then, I will throw that phrase out and my wife and I will still have a good laugh about it.