Maybe I spend too much time on the JustNo forums on Reddit, but I don't think he's your problem here. I think the problem is you don't have say what goes on in your own home and that's not ok. Home is supposed to be your sanctuary and yours is full of tension, from what sounds like a bunch of different issues. You've reached BEC status, which means Bitch Eating Crackers. BEC status is when literally everything a person does makes you f'ing furious, like 'Look at that bitch over there, eating crackers'. They need to go, regardless of who gets mad. Being so enmeshed with your own family can be really unhealthy and lead to longer-term issues.