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The real problem here is. Nobody complained about the amount of Toby abuse. That was the real mean. Human resources deserved better. all those mean gifs!
One of my points the other day was Electrolyte saying "that's enough" after an obvious compliment was kind of silly. Mis-communication or no mis-communication. Even if she wasn't included in any PMs. There was absolutely nothing wrong with Rerun's post. PMs or no PMs, back story or no back story.
100% this. I was informed that any comments that looked like "ribbing" between these members was not ribbing, and was actual hurtful/sarcastic comments that had been an ongoing issue and if mods noticed it, we were asked to help stop it. Because of this, I read the "compliment" as a sarcastic, passive aggressive comment. And with that information that I had, I responded with the "let's not". That's the full extent of it.Post by Toby: Nate doesn't like me
Post by Rerun: Nate and I have lots in common. (small text disclaimer/compliment)
That's what seems like the "Let's Not" is going to. Not the small text disclaimer. I'm sure anyone can see why there would need to be a "let's not" when there had just been a complaint. Even with the compliment at the end. As far as we knew there was still a problem and Rerun's post could be taken (in that light) not as a compliment but instead a passive aggressive way to get around the request that y'all tone it down.
For me, personally, I very rarely go into the Never Ending thread. It's not really my thing and I've poked in a couple of times but not often and not lately. This is one of the things I was alluding to in an earlier post in this conversation: it's not possible for mods to keep up on the friendship type/level/style of every member of this forum, especially when it happens in places other than the work thread. 99.9% of any moderation I do happens in the work thread because that's where I am 99.9% of the time. So since I was informed that there were issues between members that mods were asked to step in on, regardless of where that had originated from, I enforced it where I "live", which is in the work thread.What I dont understand is, 99 percent of me and reruns stuff was contained to the never ending thread. You really have to pick and choose to complain about something in the work thread.
I'm not trying to toot my own horn here, but let's look at the facts: I "liked" a lot of posts. I posted encouragement to people. I have never complained about anyone. I think I only had one post of mine mod-edited in the time I've been here.That's what seems like the "Let's Not" is going to. Not the small text disclaimer. I'm sure anyone can see why there would need to be a "let's not" when there had just been a complaint. Even with the compliment at the end. As far as we knew there was still a problem and Rerun's post could be taken (in that light) not as a compliment but instead a passive aggressive way to get around the request that y'all tone it down.
Hey, @kryss, I get where you're coming from. All I wanted was a consistent enforcement of the rules. If so-called "snark" is not allowed, then make it for everyone, not just a select few. Again, there are people whose main persona is ONLY to incite and instigate. They continue to post in this nature on a daily basis without any issues. But me? Someone who tries to do the right thing every day? Oh yeah, @Rerun, we're watching YOU.What we're running into is:
If we don't say something, we're allowing certain members to get preferential treatment.
If we do say something, we're allowing certain members to get preferential treatment.
Yours, in particular, weren't being watched. Yours, Toby's, and Peaches were. The three of you as a group. Had peachy said what you said he would have gotten the same response, as would Toby. You just happened to be the one that said it.my posts were being watched more closely than others.
So we were being ''watched'' cause somebody complained about jokes. When the problem could've been solved by placing said parties on ignore?Yours, in particular, weren't being watched. Yours, Toby's, and Peaches were. The three of you as a group. Had peachy said what you said he would have gotten the same response, as would Toby. You just happened to be the one that said it.
Think about it this way, let's say (picking random names from the Users who have read this thread) Vanyanka comes to me saying her jokes with Lil Queen Trashmouth and Kerek used to be jokes but aren't anymore. From that point on We would watch those three people's posts to keep them from picking on Van. (Or from Van picking on them.)
Do you understand why we would do that? I honestly don't know how to say this any other way and I hope it does clear it up, but if it doesn't I don't know what else to say, I'm sorry.
You're the one that complained. Would you like to us to refresh your memory? We do keep records of every interaction we have with other members, as well as discussions we have in staff chat, and I'm sure @kryss would be more than happy to provide you with screenshots of you complaining about what was going on.So we were being ''watched'' cause somebody complained about jokes. When the problem could've been solved by placing said parties on ignore?
The rerun connection is that he often joined in when you were saying things about Peachy on the forum. There were countless sarcastic or snarky posts directed at Peachy for things that he was doing, like here, here, here, here, all while Toby was making comments like this and this. And that was only one discussion on one evening (this was ongoing.) How could any reasonable person trying to moderate this forum not think that Rerun had a problem with Peachy after seeing comments like that on multiple occasions?But sitting here and thinking of stuff and placing puzzle pieces in my brain, it baffles me. but I think I understand the rerun connection and it is beyond childish. People suck. Stuff that happened privately I think melted over to complaints. (not you mods, or rerun or peach)
Where did I complain? When I said Peachy was an asshole? where rerun is too nice for his own good? I said it to his face. then we hashed it out. or please bring out all the insanely private stuff that was going on, that I confided in kryss and put that in public. im sure some of the other parties would love that. If you wanna call that complaining. then by god, go ahead. other than that. I dont recall ever complaining about anything that I didnt say to somebody myself. or that it was brought up to me.You're the one that complained. Would you like to us to refresh your memory? We do keep records of every interaction we have with other members, as well as discussions we have in staff chat, and I'm sure @kryss would be more than happy to provide you with screenshots of you complaining about what was going on.
The rerun connection is that he often joined in when you were saying things about Peachy on the forum. There were countless sarcastic or snarky posts directed at Peachy for things that he was doing, like here, here, here, here, all while Toby was making comments like this and this. And that was only one discussion on one evening (this was ongoing.) How could any reasonable person trying to moderate this forum not think that Rerun had a problem with Peachy after seeing comments like that on multiple occasions?
I've been going through staff logs this morning and I see months of discussion between us all about the rampant sarcasm and snark on the forum around that time. It wasn't just you three, either. There were several people doing it. It got to the point where members were complaining to us about it on a nearly daily basis because they all felt that it created an unwelcoming atmosphere. I see all of these discussions in my logs and it's just us going back and forth ad nauseum about who we thought was being serious and who wasn't. As the other admins have stated in this thread, that's very difficult for us to do, so we often can't do anything but watch or try to ask people what their intentions are (and they're obviously not always honest about that). But when we do get clued in that something is going on, and we can look at post histories and the sorts of things that are being said back and forth between a group of members, we're going to step in and start trying to clean it up. It is our job as admins and moderators on this forum and I can assure you that we make every possible effort to do that job fairly and consistently. If any one of you three feels that one of you shouldn't have ever been involved in this, then I'm sorry. All we have to go off of when we make decisions is what we see in front of us.
I just think you're contradicting yourself. You make that comment like you don't understand why we were watching the situation between all of you, like it was all due to complaints coming from people that don't use the ignore button, when it was you, yourself, that presented this situation to us for us to deal with.Where did I complain? When I said Peachy was an asshole? where rerun is too nice for his own good? I said it to his face. then we hashed it out. or please bring out all the insanely private stuff that was going on, that I confided in kryss and put that in public. im sure some of the other parties would love that. If you wanna call that complaining. then by god, go ahead. other than that. I dont recall ever complaining about anything that I didnt say to somebody myself. or that it was brought up to me.
I just think you're contradicting yourself. You make that comment like you don't understand why we were watching the situation between all of you, like it was all due to complaints coming from people that don't use the ignore button, when it was you, yourself, that presented this situation to us for us to deal with.
I wasn't suggesting that @kryss would post those screenshots in this thread (I meant she could refresh your memory via PM), and I'm sorry if you didn't want the fact that you talked to us known to others, but if you're going to make post after post in this thread, accusing us of somehow overreaching in our involvement with the situation, I would appreciate that everyone be forthcoming with what exactly happened.
I understand that you are upset and trying to make a point, but can you please avoid pointing out specific people.I've seen xxx be a prick. xxx, xxx, actual mean stuff.
It's funny you should bring that up, @aveline, because my commentary that day wasn't directed toward @PeachyRider, but actually the lack of moderation that ALLOWED him to post off-topic discussions in the past. (You know, arbitrary enforcement of the rules.)The rerun connection is that he often joined in when you were saying things about Peachy on the forum. There were countless sarcastic or snarky posts directed at Peachy for things that he was doing, like here, here, here, here, all while Toby was making comments like this and this. And that was only one discussion on one evening (this was ongoing.) How could any reasonable person trying to moderate this forum not think that Rerun had a problem with Peachy after seeing comments like that on multiple occasions?
And making me feel like my posts were being watched more closely than others until I became completely uncomfortable makes a welcoming atmosphere?It got to the point where members were complaining to us about it on a nearly daily basis because they all felt that it created an unwelcoming atmosphere.
So let me ask you, and I mean this with complete sincerity: why was this never clarified to us? I specifically asked one mod - more than once - to please clarify what I can and can't post. She claimed there was no different set of rules for me and that I was free to post as much as I want. But that was clearly NOT the case.Yours, in particular, weren't being watched. Yours, Toby's, and Peaches were. The three of you as a group. Had peachy said what you said he would have gotten the same response, as would Toby. You just happened to be the one that said it.
Think about it this way, let's say (picking random names from the Users who have read this thread) Vanyanka comes to me saying her jokes with Lil Queen Trashmouth and Kerek used to be jokes but aren't anymore. From that point on We would watch those three people's posts to keep them from picking on Van. (Or from Van picking on them.)
Do you understand why we would do that? I honestly don't know how to say this any other way and I hope it does clear it up, but if it doesn't I don't know what else to say, I'm sorry.
Right... because this post was about arbitrary enforcement of the rules, not about Peachy:It's funny you should bring that up, @aveline, because my commentary that day wasn't directed toward @PeachyRider, but actually the lack of moderation that ALLOWED him to post off-topic discussions in the past. (You know, arbitrary enforcement of the rules.)
How about this one? Different thread, different day. Is this also not directed at Peachy?:I don't have a dating question but I do have a question.
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Peachy, what are you doing? Seriously. Every time you come after me, you end up losing. I'm happy to go back and forth with you - *I* can certainly take it - but I don't need you getting other people in trouble with the mods because you have thin skin. Just stop already, okay? This tough guy persona just doesn't work for you, and you get burned every single time you try it with me. Believe it or not, I AM a nice guy. I'm happy to send you a word of encouragement when you need it. You're a big boy and you know what's best for you, so all I'm asking you to do is just stop and think for a second before you post again.
Guess what. Our job as moderators on this forum is to watch people's posts, sometimes with a bit of scrutiny if we think something is going on. We do it every single day because it's part of our job (probably the most important part.) This isn't all about you.And making me feel like my posts were being watched more closely than others until I became completely uncomfortable makes a welcoming atmosphere?
See the above quoted posts. It's stuff like that that we were trying to discourage and I'm sure we made that pretty clear.So let me ask you, and I mean this with complete sincerity: why was this never clarified to us? I specifically asked one mod - more than once - to please clarify what I can and can't post. She claimed there was no different set of rules for me and that I was free to post as much as I want. But that was clearly NOT the case.
Instead, I was left here to wonder WHAT I did wrong and WHAT ELSE would escalate the situation. Not a single one of you would answer me. I was slapped on the wrist and expected me to learn my lesson. Maybe it was obvious to you, but when I asked on multiple occasions for someone to explain it to me and to clarify things in a language I can understand, I was ignored. For folks that want to make this a welcoming place for all, *I* certainly didn't feel welcomed here the last several weeks.
And days like this don't make it any easier. My point is that we are all human beings here. Sometimes this "job" gets very stressful and we have bad days and need to vent. We don't get paid for this. We do it because we enjoy the community and want things to run smoothly. Sometimes when we try to make things run smoothly, we catch a lot of shit from people. Yeah, there are some days where I really hate being here. But I don't think for a second that it's not worth it.You're right, I'm sure it's VERY difficult for the mods to distinguish malicious behavior from sarcasm. Of course, a couple of you have posted - more than once - that you don't enjoy being mods and that you wish you weren't. Sarcastic or legit? I don't know. But let's not pretend that we're all not guilty of it either.
I went back and forth with you several times via PM explaining to you that there is not a different set of rules for you, and there isn't.So let me ask you, and I mean this with complete sincerity: why was this never clarified to us? I specifically asked one mod - more than once - to please clarify what I can and can't post. She claimed there was no different set of rules for me and that I was free to post as much as I want. But that was clearly NOT the case.
I explained in detail what we meant by "snarky" to you.Instead, I was left here to wonder WHAT I did wrong and WHAT ELSE would escalate the situation. Not a single one of you would answer me. I was slapped on the wrist and expected me to learn my lesson. Maybe it was obvious to you, but when I asked on multiple occasions for someone to explain it to me and to clarify things in a language I can understand, I was ignored. For folks that want to make this a welcoming place for all, *I* certainly didn't feel welcomed here the last several weeks.
Being a moderator can be a very tedious and stressful job. There's a lot of different personalities on the forum, and some days it can really take a lot out of you. A lot of the things that go on here happens, not on the daily thread, but behind the scenes. I'm not making excuses, but what we're doing here now, is trying to improve the quality and everyone's behavior (including our own) to a more productive, and positive environment.You're right, I'm sure it's VERY difficult for the mods to distinguish malicious behavior from sarcasm. Of course, a couple of you have posted - more than once - that you don't enjoy being mods and that you wish you weren't. Sarcastic or legit? I don't know. But let's not pretend that we're all not guilty of it either.
Paying attention to what someone on the forum is saying does not equate to having a different set of rules than everyone else.It took me this long to get you to admit that my posts WERE being watched closely, which goes against what was said to me about there being no different set of rules. I mean, unless you guys are making this up as you go along, then there should have been no reason for ONE of you to inform me of how to improve my behavior in the forum. I could then have a list of people I wasn't allowed to respond to, making your jobs that much easier. As it was said before, we're all adults here. Are we not reasonable people?
@kryss, you already apologized to me yesterday for not communicating to me in a way I understood. Why are you going back on that now?I went back and forth with you several times via PM explaining to you that there is not a different set of rules for you, and there isn't.
I explained in detail what we meant by "snarky" to you.
Being a moderator can be a very tedious and stressful job. There's a lot of different personalities on the forum, and some days it can really take a lot out of you. A lot of the things that go on here happens, not on the daily thread, but behind the scenes. I'm not making excuses, but what we're doing here now, is trying to improve the quality and everyone's behavior (including our own) to a more productive, and positive environment.
If there are no different sets of rules, then let me ask you...Paying attention to what someone on the forum is saying does not equate to having a different set of rules than everyone else.
@kryss, you already apologized to me yesterday for not communicating to me in a way I understood. Why are you going back on that now?
-----------------------------------------------------------On my end I felt I was being as clear as possible. I
I think we're all adult enough to know what "tone down the snark" means, or "lets all try to be more polite". I tried my best to be clear with you.I'm not sure if you skipped over the part of our PM where I specifically asked you what I can and cannot post here. Why not tell me what will keep me from being watched closely so I can make your jobs easier?
There are TONS of PMs sent to members regarding issues you see and issues you don't. Please do no assume because you don't see a moderator address something in the daily thread, that it wasn't address elsewhere. Every moderator has a different style and way of handling situations.If Bode says, "kryss, you're horrible", it's okay.
We are actively trying to address the issues, I apologize if you feel like we're not. I'm trying to see things from your point of view, but I feel I'm not being given the same common courtesy here. I spent time talking to you in PMs and felt I treated you with respect.Instead of saying, "hey, Rerun, we recognize a problem and here are the steps we're taking to solve it", you argue and get defensive. You don't really want feedback, unless it involves brown nosing. Well, I've done my share of brown nosing here already. I was one of the most LOYAL members of this forum, and I treated you with RESPECT, even though none was clearly shown to me in return. Remember, it wasn't the other posters that chased me away... it was your alienation of me that caused me to feel uncomfortable here.
I think that might prove difficult because I'm not sure how we would track it.
The easiest way for it to be implemented would be for people to label times in a uniform way.I agree with this. I do the same. I also think it would be logistically difficult, if not impossible, to rank HIT sharing higher if time is included. It'd require someone going through each day's post and counting up how often times are posted and who posted it.
I just want to echo this. I am super shiny new and the reason why I started posting was because of all the banter and small talk. It's fun, sarcastic adult interaction which I don't necessarily get on a daily basis (thanks to my teacup and miniature humans). I like that it's all kind of thrown together, it makes working a lot less monotonous. And I found it pretty easy to jump right in, obviously.I came here to state exactly what @Squatty has said. Of course, she has beat me to the punch
But she is saying what a lot of us are thinking. I also Turk on a laptop and have tried opening up different threads, but screen space is a big priority. I rather enjoy the banter displayed throughout the day, and I have never had a problem weeding through the chat to find work. I think that the post about regulating chat really threw a lot of people off and really discouraged some people from posting. That's not cool. A lot of us turk from home full time and this is our only opportunity to interact with people and have fun.
You mentioned that new members will be put off by the dialogue exchanged. I think on the contrary. I posted because I saw a community that was more than just a dead working thread with no emotion. People make friendships here. It's so cool. I feel connected with others. We learn about each other. And before you point me to other threads, again realize that most people will only have one thread open throughout the day. I don't think I've ever been so overwhelmed with posts that I've been annoyed at the situation. What makes MTC so great is that we feel connected to each other. I mean, c'mon, we just had the first forum wedding!!!! If you discouraged chat, no way that would've happened. People come here because they want interaction. They want to connect. It's human nature. It might not make sense to people who literally have an entire family to interact with, but to those of us that have only ourselves, this forum is a lifesaver. Please don't take that away from us.
And also, please don't take this as an attack, it's not. It's more like putting yourselves in our shoes. I came here because I wanted interaction. And now you're scaring people away. They come because it's cool to come here and express yourself.
Anyway, that's my 2 cents.