TEAM MELLY

[Jaded]

These are really dumb the internet has disappointed me.

 

[Jaded]

The only time incorrectly isn’t spelled incorrectly is when it’s spelled incorrectly.

 

[Jaded]

Q: What does a nosey pepper do? A: Gets jalapeno business!

 

[Jaded]

1. A few clowns short of a circus.

 

[Jaded]

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

 

[Jaded]

How do you get a sweet 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

 

[Jaded]

What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.

 

[Jaded]

A day without sunshine is like, night.

 

[Jaded]

Born free, taxed to death.

 

[Melly]

Wow Jaded I'm impressed!

 

[Jaded]

oh hi @Melly!!

I will go to great lengths to avoid working.

 

[Jaded]

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened.

 

[Jaded]

A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it.

 

[Jaded]

What is faster Hot or cold? Hot, because you can catch a cold.

 

[Jaded]

Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? He wanted to win the No-bell prize!

 

[Jaded]

When everything’s coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.

 

[Jaded]

I say no to alcohol, it just doesn’t listen.

 

[Melly]

hehe I got to take the kid to school in a few and then will be on and off... Gotta do a few adult things Tonight I will be on a ton... I'm gonna spam GIFS for the next 30 minutes

 

[Jaded]

If you can’t convince them, confuse them.

This should be my life motto

 

[Jaded]

hehe I got to take the kid to school in a few and then will be on and off... Gotta do a few adult things Tonight I will be on a ton... I'm gonna spam GIFS for the next 30 minutes

woo gifs!!