seriously? damn that would suck, wondered when I called places they would do that shit. Just find out my answer and then come back on the line...
Yup. Because the only people who take customer satisfaction surveys are the people who are pissed at having been put on hold for an hour, so to try to make people happier, they have you do inane shit that just infuriates them more, then can't figure out why people still think your customer service is a fucking joke.
Stupid people who have no phone experience write the rules.
Which was why I was required to use at least 3 "delight words" during calls at BoA. I still do that now like 7 years later. I hate you BoA
I...do this automatically, no matter what. My first phone job, when I was still in training, one of the leads was walking the floor and talked to my trainer about me cos I was all "No, thank YOU so super much, you have a lovely afternoon!" on every damn call and she thought I might have been a rehire or something. I'm really good at disguising my loathing for everyone when I'm on the phone.
See, I like this.
I like to be quiet, and listen, hear what people are doing. Or just to be told shh I'll be right back.
You're also not allowed to be silent for too long or QA will ding you for that because no one is good at estimating time on the phone and they automatically think you've disconnected the call if you don't talk.
Example
Caller: What the fuck is wrong with you people, why is my bill 52¢ higher than usual?
Me: I can definitely look into that for you, one moment while I pull that up.
[five seconds later]
Me: Sorry, my system is a little laggy right now, I only just got to your bill, let me pull up your previous months to see where the discrepancy is.
Caller: JFC, why can't you just tell me?
Me: I am absolutely trying to find this information for you, just another moment while I...a ha! I see that this month there is a charge for [insert some dumb tax].
Caller: I don't understand why that was never there before.
Me: [looks at account for ten seconds]
Caller: HELLO?! [to someone else] I THINK SHE HUNG UP ON ME.
Me: No, I'm still here, just looking at your recent address change. Is [new city] in a different county?
Caller: What does that have to do with anything?
Me: It looks like your new county has a telecom tax [blahblahblah, bullshit I mostly made up that sounded good, but was at least somewhat accurate] that the previous county didn't.
Caller: That's fucking stupid.
Me: Ha! Not gonna disagree with you there, sir. Have a fantastic evening and thanks for choosing the only wireless company that provides service in your area!